Blood, Despair, and Sorrow
by PurplesugarX
Summary: Explicit Yaoi story. Sesshoumaru is the victim of his own father; Angered, he makes a choice that will soon be regretable for him, and later for his brother as well. This is a Dark Story.
1. Chapter 1

Blood, Despair, and Sorrow

**Blood, ****Despair, and Sorrow**

**A/N: **_**So a new journey begins my fellows; I invite you now to my ride.**_

_**Warning: This is an explicit yaoi story…you have been warned; if you don't like it then bugger off.**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha.**_

_Chapter 1__ - Guilty._

_We all know who Lord Sesshoumaru is._

_Sesshoumaru; a powerful youkai Lord… A silent and enigmatic creature; he is someone who can strike fear into our hearts with just glancing in our direction._

_He is the son of the Inu no Tashio; and half-brother of the hanyou Inuyasha. Also we know about his retainers: Jaken the imp, and Rin, the little human girl._

_We all know about his lust for the legendary sword Tessaiga; and, we know about his hatred for the evil creature called Naraku._

_But …_

_Although we know this much about him; we know nothing about his past._

_Let us now travel back 300 years in the past. So we can find at last what we seek._

_Why 300 years? You ask._

_Well, that's were the real story begins…._

The storm made him feel terrified.

His hands clutched with force the heavy white blankets of his bed, pulling them closer to his now cold face, attempting to cover himself from the chilly night outside of the castle. His eyes widened in fear as he waited for the storm to pass.

Oh he hated stormy nights. But not because of fear of the storm…actually he didn't care about the storm itself. _No_, he thought. The storm itself wasn't the problem.

He hated them because every single night like this…his father would come to him.

Yes…he came to him for _that_ purpose.

All of this started when Sesshoumaru hit the age of puberty. Before that, his father had always been distant towards him, he never said hello to him, he never asked for his well being before. But when he turned 13… all of that changed.

Soon after that, his father would come to him _every single night, _to ravage his body and make Sesshoumaru feel unworthy and dirty.

After almost 6 months of sick torture; it appeared his father had grown tired of him and left him alone for a while.

Sesshoumaru never dared to tell anyone of what happened those six months, not even his mother. The main reason was because he would feel ashamed of himself.

But even if he wanted to tell her; it was an impossible task. This was because his mother was never home.

He always knew he was born only for political business, nothing more.

His mother's visits were extremely rare; but when she did visit the castle, it was only for political reasons. If he was extremely lucky, he could cross a few words with her before she left again. Not much of a mother actually.

Due to the lack of his mother's presence, he felt alone and bitter. He would talk to no one in the castle, even though there were thousands of servants who would be glad to at the least, get him to glance at their direction.

He felt truly lonely… no friends, no cousins, no mother….nothing.

It was just his father and him.

Two years had passed since his nightly activities with his father…; he had become stronger, quicker and obviously more handsome. Most of the servant girls would sigh at the sight of him.

He should have known from the beginning that his father had grown interest in him once more; he was not the crying child he used to rape anymore; he was now a handsome teen which his father could get him to respond to his touches now.

So his father came to him once again; in one stormy night. After that, his father would come only on nights with storm and thunders. Because they were the nights his father could not sleep, due to the noise outside.

One year and a half passed and his father did not seize his trips to his room…in fact; his father would come more eagerly to him because he was now a sight to behold, almost perfect body, beautiful hair, gorgeous eyes. Young too…he was turning 17 in a few weeks. What more could a man expect?

Sesshoumaru strained his ears to hear any sound coming from outside his chambers. He waited for the inevitable to come.

Soon, his heightened senses caught the sound of heavy footsteps coming his way from the other side of the hallway. Sesshoumaru closed his eyes in frustration, he was stupid enough to think the storm outside was not going to wake up his father this time.

Seconds later, Sesshoumaru heard his door slide open and soon after got closed. He immediately felt the powerful presence of his father and caught the unmistakable scent of arousal.

The scent washed through all of his scences. His heart started to beat faster in anticipation. Soon, he was heavily aroused as well.

That was what he most hated about all of this…he _liked_ it. He liked that his father could bring him such pleasure that could drive him mad.

He felt guilty. His head would often scream at him saying that it was his father's fault he felt this way. He is your father! It screamed. You are not supposed to be doing these things with him!

He was snapped out of his thoughts when he felt a strong hand touching gently his chest and slowly slid down his body until it arrived to one of his inner thighs. 'Stop pretending my love…' he said in a silky voice as he started to caress his inner thigh. 'I know you are awake…and eager for my touches too' he whispered as he landed a feather like kiss to his lips.

Sesshoumaru could handle it no more as he reached desperately for his father hand that was caressing him; trembling, he grabbed it and guided it to the bulk of his erection, so he could work there. He soon let out a moan of pleasure.

He turned to his father and saw the deep lust his father had in his eyes as he looked at him hungrily. 'Father…' he replied, as Sesshoumaru's other hand traveled to his father's pants and started to massage expertly the now naked phallus that was presented to him. It was now his father's turn to let out a deep moan of delight.

His father bent to capture his lips one more, this time he kissed him in a more heated way. Sesshoumaru kissed back with equal or more passion as his father started to disrobe him.

Here they went again, Sesshoumaru thought bitterly. So, he would have another night of guilty pleasure, he thought bitterly, another night that despair would eat him alive. He couldn't believe himself… he enjoyed it!

It happened all over again….once again in one stormy night.

When they finished, his father clothed himself again and left with out saying a word to his own chambers, leaving Sesshoumaru naked once more in the floor shaking in pure sorrow.

He hated himself…he realized that he was starting to fall in love with his own father. And what most hurt was that his father would never love him back; because he only used him for his own needs.

Silently, Sesshoumaru made a quiet vow to himself. Someday, his father would pay dearly for what he did to him all this years…for what he made him feel.

Slowly, he put his clothes back and went to bed. His limbs were tired, and his thighs hurt like hell. He knew he was going to sleep very little that night; not because of the discomfort and pain, but because he would not be able to put his mind on ease after what happened.

Dejectedly, he closed his eyes, waiting for slumber to conquer him.

Before his mind went numb, one single tear slid his cold cheek.

Guilty.

TBC.

_**A/N:**__** Once upon a time, I would have never dreamt to make a story like this, but I think its time it was done . I will not tell you what the pairings are right now…but you can guess.**_

_**Review if your kind enough... it just takes a few seconds.**_

_**Silence and Solitude**_


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: you should thank Kami that I don't own Inuyasha

**Disclaimer: you should thank Kami that I don't own Inuyasha.**

**Anger**

Sesshoumaru changed his sitting position inside the hot spring, whipping angrily away the little droplets of water out of his face.

17 years old... damn it.

All his muscles (specially the lower ones) throbbed as if like they were on fire; His last activity with his father had truly exhausted him. He massaged his temple in exasperation. God…he hated being treated like a simple toy.

He submerged himself deeper into the hot water; the steam coming out of it sent shivers down his spine. He closed his eyes sleepily, feeling the day's events catching up with him. What a day.

After the formal celebration for his 17th birthday (which he dreaded), his father led him to his chambers with the excuse of giving him his birthday present.

To Sesshoumaru's surprise, his father did give him a present. His father's 3rd sword- Tenseiga. He was told that Tenseiga was not any sword but a special one, one that would only work if he showed his true feelings. Before he could even register what happened, his father hugged him.

Shocked, he slightly turned his head. His father had never hugged him before. After that, his father kissed him on the lips.

Sesshoumaru mentally rolled his eyes…really; he should have seen that one coming.

Well, thought Sesshoumaru. That incident was the reason he was now in the castle's interior hot springs, hoping the hot water would soothe his sore limbs.

He sighed as he felt his muscles start to relax in the quietness of the hot spring. He loved hot water. His sighed again, this time not in content but in sadness. He slowly rested his head in the wet rock behind him, opening his eyes to stare sadly at the ceiling.

Why did his father hug him? Was it some kind of trick so he could kiss him? Or…Did he do it because he actually… meant it? Was… his father falling in love with him?

'_Yeah right'_ a voice told him in the back of his mind _'He only wants to touch your body that pervert, pedophiliac—" _Sesshoumaru made the voice stop before it could continue. He was starting to talk with himself.

Great.

He uncomfortably shifted his position. _Never mind that_. He scolded the voice lightly. Sesshoumaru thought back in time, when he sweared he would have vengeance. Now that he thought of it, he realized that he couldn't fulfill that promise. In fact, he could never find himself hating his father completely. He closed his eyes miserably. _'That is because you enjoy everything he does to you' _said the voice in his head knowingly. He found himself grinning. He frowned suddenly.

Was he agreeing with his inner voice? I mean, it was bad enough that he _listened _to voices, and now he was agreeing with them?! He shook his head furiously. **NO.** That was not possible. He couldn't b have enjoyed being touched gently and enjoyed having a big pulsing erection…between his legs; he couldn't…

He grew rigid as he remembered those sweaty nights: remembered those strange positions so he could get his release; those wet kissed that gave shivers down his spine…Fuck it, there was no use denying it to himself or trying to justify it; his father was quite a man…

He slowly ran his hand down his abdomen, past his thigh, claws gently brushing against his arousal. Bit by bit he ran his palm firmly over the hard, clothed flesh between his legs with reluctance at first while fires swirled to life in his lower belly.…It wouldn't hurt if he enjoyed himself a little bit…

He threw his head back in delight as he increased the speed of his ministrations; small pants echoed through the night as he felt his release approximating. He was about to!—

He stopped just before it happened. Had he just- **NO! **_Nonononono!!_

Just before he had his release; he had imagined his father's handsome face sweating as they both sought for their climax.

Sesshoumaru slapped his forehead in anger. "I'm hopeless" he said out aloud miserably. He bowed his head in defeat… '_Who are you kidding?_' said the voice bitterly. '_You love him; you can't wait for his next trip to your chambers_'

Angered at himself, he dressed himself, got out of there and headed for his father's chambers. Why wait if he could go for himself? Maybe he should start seeking _him_ for assistance…

**0o0O0o0**

_**--Meanwhile in Inu Tashio's chamber--**_

Inu Tashio caressed gently with his long finger the soft cheek of the beautiful human maiden that slept peacefully besides him after their lovely time together.

-Izayoi…- he murmured softly.

He had found this beautiful woman a year ago; she was traveling back to her home, when some bandits attacked her traveling party. He happened to be passing by when he heard some awful screams. When he found out what was happening he killed the bandits and helped the terrified woman lying by his feet, to stand on her own. He immediately noticed the great beauty of her features.

Soon, she fell in love with him, and became lovers until recently. Although he admitted Sesshoumaru was his favorite; despite himself, he was growing fond of the human girl lying beside him.

He sniffed her wonderful scent: flowers and rainbow-- wait… something was off. He sniffed her once again, now paying more attention to the details of her marvelous scent. He caught the whiff immediately. It shocked him

She was pregnant.

Now what? He had so much to worry about… but this? How could he handle such problem? He never had intended to impregnate her; he should have been more cautious. Although the child was going to be a hanyou, we could not bring himself to kill the infant when it was born. He knew well what happened to hanyou outside; they were not accepted, neither by humans or youkai. They suffered and on most cases they were killed or used as slaves.

He felt some movement beside him. It appeared that somehow, he had waked her up. She stirred and opened her sleepy eyes, focusing them on his own. – "Is something wrong?" she asked in her melodic voice.

He knew she had to know sooner or later, so he decided that he should tell her now. "You are pregnant" she registered the information slowly, for a moment she looked shocked, but then the feeling wore of and instead she gave him a lovely smile "So that means we are going to have a baby? That's wonderful!" She threw herself in his arms and gave him a passionate kiss.

Dumbfounded, he didn't sense until too late a powerful presence near his chambers door, leaving quickly after witnessing the scene before it.

'_Oh no' _he though worriedly as he felt waves and waves of anger, distress and sorrow coming out of the presence he felt before. He saw them

Sesshoumaru had seen them.

_**TBC**_

_**Review please, it only takes a few seconds.**_


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